Broken book of dreams.

Hehe i really like it^^

First Day of School?

My mother drove me down to the bus-stop where this big yellow bus came and picked me and a few others up. Before that, a girl named Brownie looked at me and asked how was i doing. Had i known her? Her blond hair pulled back in a bun and her rosey freckled cheeks did seem comforting. She smiled when i nodded and started texting on her black phone. Once the bus arrived, i carfully took my four steps up slowly and said "Hello" to the driver, Lynn. Standing in the isle i felt like an idiot, only two faces screamed at me. One belonged to a blond haired girl (and i mean like snow blond obviously dyed.) with green eyes and paleish skin. She waved to me and the words fell out of my mouth "Hey Nickelodeon~!" I laughed. The driver coughed at me so i quickly ran to my seat and plopped down on the cold brown false leather seats, pushing my bags under the seat and tucking my hair behind my ears. "It's cold today, Kia." A boy from the opposite seat spoke to me. He was in basket ball shorts and a blank tee shirt, both of course white. His orangish brown hair was odly ruffled and the one thing that stuck out beside his eyes, was his big nose. "Hey Billith. Yeah it really is." I answered without thought. A strange feeling spread over my upper thigh as i pulled a blue phone from my pocket. 'NEW MESSAGE FROM DAISKAY' it read. Daiskay? My face flushed quickly as i opened the phone and read it, "Goodmorning love, sleep well?" I whimpered and tried to hide my excitement from Nickelodeon by leaning forward in the seat, i messaged back to him "Good morning to you too Daiskay~ how'd you sleep J.?" Something came to my mind, his real name is Jason. I laughed to myself as the message sent and i got all warm in my chest. I knew this boy, so so well, infact without a doubt, i know i love him. Nickel nudged me and started to ask what i did yesterday and what my weekend plans were, of course after tucking away her science notes she always seemed to be studying. "I'm not sure, my minds a little mixed up." I responded. She seemed to understand as her eyes saddened. "I'm so sorry about Monday.. I'm glad you're alright." she whispered. What was she talking about. "Crazy how you fell from a tree that high trying to get your shoe!" she gasped. Feeling the back of my head there was a soft bump. Amnesia? "Well, its Thursday now, glad to see you're back." She smiled and about that time another blond came on. Sitting directly adjacent from me she chirped with six books, romance and yaoi? in her arms. "Did you finish that anime?!" she cried. "Ana, hi! And no, i didnt not yet so dont ruin it for me!" i replied enthusiasticly. God, how many blond girls did i know? Glancing at Bilith i got another text, "You okay? You know i always tell you be carefull..." From Jason on my phone. I felt bad, guilty and i texted back, "I'm so sorry, i didnt mean too.." and closed my phone aswell as my eyes.

*sighs happily* i lurve your stories^.^

The Fault On My Part, The Peice of Heart that Turned to "bish" and left.

The next thing i felt was a warm hand on my shoulder, shaking me gently. "Hey? Enka? C'mon we gotta get off the bus, Billith left already." I woke and paniced. "Damnit! I'm so sorry!" i whined and tugged hard to get this oversized heavy bag out from under the seat, i heard a slight rip and sighed with greif knowing it wont work so well now. I struggled with this bag another moment before standing, jerking and with it coming free i flew into the other seat hitting my head on the window. "Hey Girl! Come on now! Get to school!" Ms. Lynn called at me. Dizzy i stood and regained balance, picking up my now torn and heavy bookbag and walking down the isle. Nickelodeon was already gone. I sighed again as i stepped off the bus and began walking without thought again. The strangeness of walking through a croud of loud, bustling kids dressed in all different colors and huddled in groups chatting loudly or chasing eachother around the wet cold grass. Shuffling without a jacket through the dewed grass, i watched my breath come out as clouds that faded in moments. Almost tripping, my foot hit concrete and i looked up to see the pillars to the outside of the caffeteria. Walking up to the windowed wall, i pulled open a cold blue door and stepped in. The warm air annoyed me slightly but i continued walking down past blue tables on my far left, rounding a left corner and passing a boys bathroom to see two blue benches, three vending machines and two drinking fountains. Rubbing my eye i caught a glance of four people sitting over there, first one to catch my eye was a girl with long brown hair in a grey sweatshirt and blue jeans. she set down her own bag and waved at me. She had a childish face with sweet brown eyes and a playful voice. I smiled and waved back, but the moment my eyes caught another girl, with almond brown hair that deepened to raven black at the ends which lightly touched her shoulders, i ran to her. Upon impact of my tackle she groaned and i began nuzzling her neck and whimpered. "G'morning, Rinca and NJ!" i yelped (NJ is a reversed strange abriviation for Innjeh, which is actually spelt Ynnej, but i switched some things around and changed them a bit leaving a name sounding like N-J). Letting go of the raven haired girl i smiled at her, her greenish yellow eyes looked at me and she laughed a little, doing her upside-down unique smile that only looked good on her. She had a white lace ribbon on her neck and a grey jacket. Her favorite color. She started talking about band practice and i nodded as Innjeh added in. "This girl Arleem is always yelling at me! She keeps saying stuff like, 'you dont try, you do it' when i'm trying my best but its so hard!" she whimpered. I patted her on the back. God that pissed me off so much, when someone suddenly decides to have the power of judgement. I narrowed my eyes at the thought and sighed. "Well... Just ignore her Innjeh," I said. "Yeah! No one messes with my Jeh-neh" Rinca added. Silly Rinca, always playing with words like me. Hehe. (Rinca, my other reverse name for Catalina, or Cathinayla) and, about my name. My father calls me Bug, my friend Nickelodeon and Billith sometimes call me Kia. As for my actual name, its Enka. (Like the letter N with a kah or cuh or whatever.) We began talking about our classes when the bell rang, and I laughed. First Period, Math? Geometry~! Right! I'm starting to feel like me again. Pulling on my bag, waving and saying, "buh-bye" to eachother, i scooted out the door and ran across the opposite yard from the breeze-way to the new building where i entered my first class. "Sigh.. Great.'' I murmured, grabbing my calculater off the hanging matt and looked around. I knew these people, but there she was, the one i'd wish to have avoided most... Arleem. She sat there with her heavily-done eygeption stypled eyeliner and her dark eyes, staring out like she was some one she wasn't, unwanted, oh but yet she was fashined with a facial peircning and had highlighted black hair cut short to her neck aswell. Dark indian skin and rounded lips, wearing a very, very expensive brand jacket (i may not buy clothes, but i know when they are sooo expensive) plus a ripped shirt, a very floozy skirt and stripped stockings. This chick looked like a sad, false-vintage go-go dancer. A pathetic one at that.
Of course.. This could just be my hurt talking..
Let me explain my issue with her. She is the kind of girl, who demands attention, but instead of talking to a person, she makes it all about her by acting so sad and unwanted, just like her other friend, Ikki. She acts like shes emo and that her dad hates her, like not a damn person in the world cares for her, she does anything to sleep with a boy she has the hotts for, or a girl.. and then tries to act like he/she forced themselves on her. She dresses like a ... mmm... a person who wants to be touched, and then sometimes she makes retarded sounds like "Whooshi-whoo-hooo" in the middle of class. See i used to be her old friend, till she got all stalkerish on her other best friend. I felt like we were falling apart, and i wanted to know if i could still trust her and vice-versa. So i told a lie, said some things i guess i shoulda not said, but anyways, I told her "You can't tell anyone else, not even Krissy," and she promised. Next day, Krissy the stuck up blond horse-face bitch comes up and slaps the crap out of me. "You shouldn't be saying crap like that!" and left. Arleem hated me ever since, trying to blame me for cutting her, no not her wrists, but her ankles. Yes folks, her ankles. But i didn't care, had she waited one more day, i would have came up to her and explained my reasons behind what i said, sure i acted it up a little, but still... I thought about explaining anyways, but once a trustless ghost, always a trustless ghost.. her loss not mine. But that basically sums up my disliking for this girl i used to know so well, who at one time was my darker skinned twin. Hmph, anyways, devoting my attention to work i studied as hard as i can and still, bombed the test with a 67.. Great.

Tehe^^ like i've said a million times i lurve your story....Down to Arleem!!XD

The bell rang and i ran with my bag and binder out the door almost tripping on several people into my next class, biology. I sat down infront as usual, glad to have my memory at. Maybe the whole Mia thing was a dream while i was hurt.. oh well. Pulling out a green and white tydyed notebook i flipped open to a page with a wolf leaping over a canyon. This was my drawing. Nothing special about it, just a grey wolf leaping/diving over a gorge in the ground to get to the other side, wind kicking up sand and dried petals into the air, the pattern creating wing shapes behind the wolfs back as its ears were pulled back and the background was an ocean. Continuing to doodle as Mr. Wayahath began teaching. I didnt neeeeed to take notes, i was pretty much the smartest in this class, beside the two geeks who have to be a smart ass about everything, and can never understand a simple metaphore or saying, these would be, Eterp Negrollia, and Lincoln Atheb. Anywho, I did the hand outs he gave and passed the tests with 99's or higher. I studied when i didnt know something and i took notes when he said it was neccasary, at least i'm not like Becca who seems shes gotta start something with the teachers... However, i have to admire her, she's got a hell of a spit-fire mouth and she wont tolerate being spoken down to. I can't say we're friends, i mean we are but only at school. Okay, maybe i'll tell you about Spanish and Civics for tomorrow, but today i wanted to skip to staying after school.

And thank you Momo :3 you're the only one who reads them.

no Kat read a sentence^^ and your welcome

. . . *sighs* bech.

Okay~ skipping through spanish, lunch and civics~

We come back at~~~

The bell rang loudly startling me though i had my bag zipped and on my back. Standing from my desk i walked out of the class behind the other twenty four loud running teenagers. Becca passing by with her usual loud music. Heading down the hallway and entering the breezeway, i looked out to see the band and flagcore practicing. Rinca and Innjeh must be out there, i think. Looking hard i saw them standing in the feilds, unusually, i have higher eyesight than average, so i saw in clear veiw Innjeh in her grey jacket and soccer shorts moving to the steps behind little (should i say big)-miss boo-hoo me, false-vintage go-go dancer, Arleem. And to the back right, I saw Eve (dawn) leading the flag group, Rinca moving gracefully with her flag, I laughed as i started walking again, counting the stripes on her black and white jacket in my mind. Usually~ i head to the busses to go home, but today was special. I had finally convinved Mr. Shrek to let me join band-aids for once. Thus meaning, i'd get to ride their busses to competition and help out the band-aids (people who set up props and stuff) Of course though, every flower had a nasty little ant who's annoying sting could dull down even the brightest petals. One nasty word. Ikki.
I ran across the breeze-way, jumping down off the walkway and ran down the side of the caffeteria, making a sharp left to jerk open a door and run down the commons, past the music room, and run into Brownie. She was standing against the door to the gym and looked at me with a smile. She glanced me over and said, "I can see your bra." I blushed dark and growled. Jeez, what was her eyes doing there anyways!? hugging myself i said back "Damnit, why doesnt anyone tell me this?" she shrugged and laughed a little. I asked where i should sit my stuff, and, she shrugged again. Sighing a little i set my things down on the internal concession stand booths and ran out the doors past her into the feilds on the other side of the street. As i ran, a couple of jerks on my bus passed by calling, "Runny skinny-little white band-tard!" shrugging them off i kept running till i got up to the batting gate/cage and peeked through the chain links, my eyes fist caught Rinca, she was spinning and twirling the flag smoothly, though i could see the concentration in her greenish yellow eyes. She was a good fifty feet or so away, her jacket twirled lightly at the bottom like a dress and she looked so feminine and sleek i laughed and muttered. "Freaking pole-dancer deer~" of course i was only kidding, and she never heard me. I was pretty envious. Such a nice body, and she knew how to use it too. Dont get me wrong, i'm not a lesbian, and i dont have the hotts for her (maybe if i was a guy ;3 ) i mean, suuure she's my wifey but still. I watched her finish her routine, her choco-to-raven hair spun and fell neatly but dramatically as she jabbed the poles end down almost to the ground but stood with her legs in a thrust forward almost leaping stance. Of course, Eve commented on her to help with balance, but she was the only one that Eve didnt touch. Anywho, i turned my eyes to Innjeh who was busy moving her feet to the rhythm and doing her best, but Arleem and her bratt friend Ayt-kee (8-key) kept screwing up, so once their performance was done, the two of them started blaming Innjeh. I growled wanting so badly to punch Arleem in her 'weak shoulder' that she got from trying so desperately to please a boy who she was in-lust with, but moved wrong and POP. Any~ who~ Everyone set down their instruments/flags and moved around, thats when Innjeh and Rinca showed up, "you can sit on the bleachers Onee!" Rinca called, I nodded and laughed giving a thumbs up. "Can you hold my flute?" Innjeh asked me as i sat. Nodding aswell as taking Anas picoloe i think its spelled that way? o.o Ana stepped into line a few people behind Innjeh, her knee in a white brace. Her dog ran into her a week or two ago and tore a ligament. I felt bad. She moved with her soft figure, stepping with her ghostly habit and not missing a beat. Of course Innjeh was doing fine and Rinca was focused as ever. Before coming here, i promised to be silent. Mind you its been thirty minutes and i peeped not a word. Finally, outside march practice was over, and the whole lot of us... eh.. them and i.. i feel to much of an outcast to be a part. Seeing how i'm not even part of the band.. though i badly wanted to be.. sigh. oh well. Heading back into the building, I followed Rinca to the commons, and watched her aswell as five others doing their dances. Checking my phone for messages from Jason. I recieved one, "Hey" and i responded "Hello^^ Have a good day?" took a while but he answered, "Yeah, and you my love?" i squirmed slightly.
"yeah, i'm with Rinca at her practice." and i never got a message back till eight that night. I felt bad again, Jason has a lot to deal with, his parents arent exactly the greatest, his sisters a clever little enemy to him, plus his friend Diddle, the jackass to me friend, sucks up his time like i do to Rinca or Innjeh sometimes. Plus, this year he signed up for chorus, and to work on the haunted high, aswell as stay in his club. With so much going on, sometimes its hard to get a full conversation going.. let alone a little affection, since hes a good working and focuses hard on everything he does, he probably doesnt have time to text and does the best he can to respond as best and alertly as possible. Though, i'll never admit it to him, but, i feel alone and a little brushed off when i say something like, "I love your eyes" or "*hugs you and licks your cheek*" and i get back, "I love u to" or "*kisses back and nuzzles*" which are slightly similar but.. completely different. I dont blame him though, like i said, he's got a lot to deal with, especially girls. Unlike me, he's got girls throwing themselves at him, online and in reality~! I trust him and all, but ya know, it isnt fair if i get jealous is it, it'll only stress him out more.. I do a lot of thinking sometimes, and these are the thoughts i had as i walked up to subway to get a sandwhich and come back. We've been together for a year now, and even better, without a fight~! ^^ he's the sweetest thing and i adore him so much, but i know he's gotta life and things to do. Sitting on a bench and ignoring the cookies being offered, i continued to think about Jason constantly, wondering what he's doing, what does he do at haunted high, does anyone bully him like i get bullied? Is he doing okay in school? How is he feeling, had any bad dreams? What did he get to eat for lunch, or breakfast today? Does he pack or buy lunches? Does his mom ever hug him? Or what about his dad? Has his dad finally started being nicer? I want to know if he's really happy... At the same time i'm burning Rincas image deep into my brain every sweep she makes, six more questions pop up. Why does he like silver? Does he name his knives? Are his sheets still blue? Did he get his wall fixed? Whats his favorite soda? Whats his favorite color of monster??? All the damn time he's racing through my mind, even as i type this. I wonder how often he thinks of me.. mew a lot i believe. I end my thoughts on the note that he isn't ignoring me, he's just busy, and thats the damned truth. Exactly at that point, Rinca has just landed in her jabbing leap poise. I start clapping and listen silently to Eves critics and see Rincas face, accepting and determined. Innjehs the same way... Much better than I who's so hard headed at times. Practice ends and Rinca walks me to Mr. Shrek to figure out what bus i'll be riding. Bus 1 he says, and i get to wear Rincas shirt~! Of course i'll be working with Ikki. Hmph.

write more please^^

The Hell Momo D:< i can only write so much at one time without burning out and forgetting everything that happened the current day D:<

sowwy but it's really good>.<"

*sighs* Okay, sorry that i havent been posting lately. Just been feeling.... unhappy and unlively.

Day of the Comp~!!! (Third)

I woke up at eight that morning, snuggled in my bed with my wolfeh-wolfeh (wool-feh) and my dog, Skinny curled up behind me. Yawning i pulled myself out of bed, flinching at the sound of a thud. Looking over the bed as my hair fell into my eyes, i saw it was only my house phone, laughing i then glared at it. Jason and i were supposed to talk last night... but he was so tired from Haunted High he kept falling asleep, so after the third time of dozing off, he politely asked to leave. Though i was pissed and sad, because i get a high talking to him, i agreed. After all, it is selfish to keep someone else awake and cause further exhaustion just for your own wants.... right? Shaking my head at it, i started going over what i remembered from Friday night. Regular school day, regular teasing, and regular stuck-up teacheres. I came home, did my homework and lazied around until time came to call Jason! Course, we already know my night didnt end fantastically, though not badly either. As I am picking up my clothes that i slothed off onto the floor, i process his voice again. Ahh, i dont mean to sound so lovey-lovey, but seriously, hearing his voice, its like getting an injection of... a relaxent. You feel safe, okay, and at the same time, like your going to explode from happiness. I've never felt that way before, ever. I walked over to my hamper, absent-mindedly moving the shoes ontop and setting them on a chair that i rolled down the street three years ago from a couple who moved away and gave it to me, saying they didnt really need it where they were going.. I know elderlys dont really need much, but they gave up a lot. Two beds, this chair and tons of furniture. Slidding the shirt and pants in, i yawned again and rubbed my eyes. Blinking i looked over at the closed blinds. Today was special to me, it was the first time, i've ever been with the band, who i so deeply longed to join... But more importantly, i'd be with Rinca and Innjeh! Getting a gust of adrenaline in my system, i started to giggle and pulled my blinds open, letting in the golden white sunlight. I was blinded at first, but got over it soon enough, did a 180* turn and walked to my closet, pulling out some clothes. Rinca was going to let me borrow her Band shirt anyways, so i just slipped on a plain white tanktop, and a pair of jeans, then covered up with a light weight black jacket. Then i face-palmed myself, i didnt shower! Quickly, i grabbed my cellphone, which was easy to find due to its shiny blue color, that and it was hooked up to its charger.. anywho, i grabbed it and ran down my hall, carefull not to slam into my piano desk and slung myself around the door fram into the bathroom. Flipping a light on, i paused infront of the mirror. Wow, this is what i looked like.. Still i feel like i'm not myself, but i can't tell Rinca, and i really cant tell Innjeh, not that they wouldnt understand, but.. i dont want to scare them... what if we did something super special and i wasnt, 'awake' to be here for it!? How sad they'd be!!! And i dont have the heart to hurt them.. or worry them.. I must be as selfless as possible, i never want to lose myself, or them. Ever. I snapped back to reality when i heard a soft 'plink' followed by another and another. I looked up into the mirror to see i was shedding tears one after another. "STOP IT!" i screamed and grabbed my head falling to my knees and panted. Lately migraines have been attacking me, i've kept that a secret too.. I'd be lost if i hurt either of them, in any way.. Especially Jason.. how would he feel? I can't risk his heart aching more than it already does.. Reality bit again when my nails began to dig into my flesh, they tend to do this when i think or lose control and grasp of whats real. Sighing, i stood and began stripping down. Standing on the plush blue matt before my toiled adjacent to my shower, i ran my hands down my body, good, i really am all here. I reached past the semi-clear shower curtain, decorated with colored fish that have googlie-eyes, and turned on the water, waited for the steam to arise, shut the door and locked it, then slid in. The water felt nice against my skin, my muscles unknotted if only temporarily, and the steam helped clear my head. I started going over what i should be focused on today. One, getting my things packed before Rincas mom shows up, Two: i need to clean my room, and Three: I must be the best i can for the band. God forbid i screw up.. In a shower, i can stand there for hours, just let the water pelt lightly on my back, the water run down the slim of my back, down the spine and past the back of my thighs spiraling around my knees and calves to my ankles then passing behind my heels towards the drain. It felt like warm ribbons wrapping around me. I like ribbons too. Bells on them are all the cuter, of course, i'll never wear a bell and ribbon, thats Rincas thing, not mine... and i cant wear one in my hair, Innjeh and Rinca do this too, so instead i wear a ribbon around my wrist. Here's a secret, I'm not so sure why they wear their ribbons the way they do, but i wear mine for a specific purpose. A ribbon around my wrist, means i am handsy, i am quick, and i will fight if i must. That they are weapons and my care-takers. Depending on the color depicts the source i use my hands for. Often it matches Rincas and Innjehs, saying i am part of them and i will defend, seeing how there are bitches all over our school who love to tease the sweet and caring... biting my lip i open my eyes to see, and sigh as my mother hollars its been fifteen minutes. Reluctantly, i began to pump orange shampoo into my palm. I say reluctantly not because i dont like washing my hair, because honestly i cant stand filthy hair, i can go for days but i prefer not too. Its because, every step of cleaning myself i take, draws my shower to be shorter and closer to its end. Closing my eyes, my hands started to massage in the soap, the scent of orange sweet citrus filled the air and the steam only condensed it further. Humming a song called "Innocence" By Miku Hatsune (vocaloid) I smiled at the feeling of suds running down me again. Backing up i let the water rinse away the grime and white fluff. "Enka!" my mothers voice called. "Alright!" i yelled back. Finishing up quickly and running the razor around its routine boundries, i shut the water off and cussed as i saw that i cut my knee for the first time with a razor. Growling i just dabbed the blood away and struggled into my panties and pants, slipping on socks, clasping my neon green bra on and running to my room. I decided i wanted a shirt, slipping on a pink marine shirt, and grabbing a matching marine jacket with silver wings on the back, i swept up my bag and ran down the stairs to find Mrs.Chell. "Hi!!!" I yelled loudly, gasping she opened her arms ducking a little "HEY!" she called back. Dropping my things i tackled her, gently of course and she kissed me on the cheek. This is Rincas mother. After briefly, but very fondly greetings, I picked up my stuff and ran to the red jeep outside, pulling the grey handle i pulled open the door, plopped down and got settled. "SNAP!" i yelped. "Oh hey Mr. A1-J-sauce!" I said to Mr. Aj. Running out i darted in, up the stairs, took my computer (laptop) and raced back to the car, in record time, shoes included.

You write really good stories Luna^^

A huff escaped my chest as i lay against the seat, Aj-steaksauce looked at me, i smirked and stole his sunglasses. hehe, i love doing that! He just growled at me but smiled and laughed hard like he always does when i get clueless or get smart. Handing back his glasses as Mrs. Chell came back and got in the car. "Off to Innjehs!" I yelled. "Sssshhhhh! Girl not so loud baby, its the morning!" Mrs. Chell warned me. Giggling i slumped in my seat, belt on and pressed my nose to the glass as she drove like a bat-outta-hell. Course she was a well orientated and well directed bat, so i wasnt in any danger. Anyways, I listened to her and Aj talk, then grew bored and stared at the whizzing life that passed by me, windows were like television, only there are no repeats, everything is always different one way or the other, i loved the thought of running at this speed, and the thought of being able to stick my head out the window to let the wind whip through my hair, but of course the other cars might find that dis-orientating. The car-ride is usually long to most people, but to me, it was releatively short, seeing how i knew every curve. I don't remember names of roads, only the pictures and images, if you take me to a place, and let me see, i can navagate my way back purely on mememory. I almost fell asleep when Rincas mom started telling me about what she got Rinca for breakfast, a sammich from King of Da Burga! I laughed a little and nodded, she clearly seemed like she wanted to get her daughter a breakfast she enjoyed, and well.. i could only feel bad sometimes.

^^ "off to Innjehs!" haha i feel special now

I could only feel bad because, Mrs. Chell did her best to make her daughter happy, but as usual with us teenagers, we see parents as an annoyance and the enemy. I sighed softly to myself wondering if i was a terror to my mother and father, then i remembered how lucky i am to have parents who still love each other... I'd never tell, but secretly family stuff makes me have heart aches.. Innjeh has such a large family, and they all get to gether well and dandy, the playfullness and warm hearted welcoming style they have, always made me so jealous... and Rincas family, is kinda split into two, however i've never seen her dads section. She lives beside her grandparents and with her brother and stepdad (mom included) They are a loving family... in a sense.. but their personalities tend to collide, and though they yell and fight sometimes, they fall back into the best-friend mood thats always set, I felt welcomed into their family from Day-1... Mrs. Chell is my mother away from my mother, and every bit as close to me as my skin is to my body. I loved how they could freely express their emotions, anger, saddness, dissaproval, and in the end, they'd forgive one another and still stick up for eachother. Rinca however, she's a little odd with family.. sometimes she'll say her mothers awsome! And other times she'll question, "when am i not upset with her?" irratedly i'll growl silently and just shrug. Not saying i have a bad family, just I live with my mother and my father, occasionally seeing my brother once or twice a month if even that... and i havent seen my other relations in a very very long time.. some in three years. I was the kind of girl who wanted sixteen brothers and sisters, to be able to run over to grandpas so he'd take me fishing since my dads at work, and have my grandma and mom help me with baking something, but of course, want what you'll never have. I kept thinking selfishly and bit my lip once i saw my reflection in the window, snarling i ripped my eyes away from the glass and huffed. "Y'okay back there sug?" Mrs. Chell asked. Realizing how odly i was acting, i shook it off with one of my retarded laughs and smiled. "Yeah! Just a little nervous! You know you have to work with...bleh, Icky right?" I responded. She laughed and said she felt bad for me, just then we turned on Sweetie Lane and i started to unbuckle myself as we pulled into Innjehs yard, where Rinca and Innjeh were running around being goofs, naturally. Envy bit me for a brief second as i watched them, and i had to remind myself, i'm the newbie, these two have known eachother for almost ever, and i'm just a tag-along. But, I'm not quite sure what my existance means to them, if i'm just a friend, or if they love me like they say they do. Nonetheless, i threw open the door of the red jeep just as it stopped, and chased after them into the cabin that help the life of the main family. Upon entering, my nose was filled with frying potatoes and eggs, country home-made breakfast. "Inka come on!" Innjeh shouted. She sometimes says my name a little odly, but i think its adorable. "Okay!" i grinned, and we raced up the stares , taking a left and entering her room past a wooden oak door. A bed directly infront of me, a dresser to my imidiant left and a TV adjacent to that. While Rinca was busy gathering her stuff, Innjeh showed me her new wolf curtains on her windows and i gasped with an angry face i grabbed her shoulders and whined, "Gimme gimme gimme!!!" then hugged her, burrying my face into her neck letting her warm soft brown hair envelope my face and neck, she was so comforting, that i could never tell her. Every time i hugged her, i'd unknowingly breathe in her scent, and i never knew why till i recently began to think about it, it comforted me, made me feel safe, relaxing and homey. She hugged back and laughed when Rinca made her usual sound "Meh." We let go, i kissed Innjeh on the nose and she explained that she'll be there after practicing for soccer and playing her game, i meant to wish her best of luck, but Rinca had me by the back of my shirt pulling me down the stairs and only let go when i caught up, racing off to the car, i took Rincas stuff and put it with mine, then as we pulled out, we both waved to Innjeh.

acually it was a game but what ever^^

The rest of the day was.. a little odd... The mood inside the car instantly dropped when Rinca dropped her hand and sighed. I felt bad, and realised that she might have been tired, thats when she bit into her burger. I asked her whats wrong and she responded irratibly, "I'm tired." while an onion ring, now broken into a string, was between her teeth as she pulled away from the burger. I nodded and hugged her, I wasn't going to let her make me feel tired too. She growled and I pulled away, sitting against the window, clapping my hands a little. "I'm so excited to go to competition with you today!" I cheered. Rinca just looked up at me, and said nothing with a blank face, crumpling up her burger that had only one bite out, and dropped it disgustedly in the bag. "Something wrong?" I asked her again. "I dont like eating!" she snapped. I mewed and sat away from her, leaning against the door. "Sorry," I whimpered. Even though she's a grump, and it's just from lack of sleep, it still stung a little at times. But, I still tried to get a smile out of her, unsure of what my company meant to her, I joked, "Well, I'll be good so you won't hate me all weekend, I can't wait to have fun with you!" I said laughing a little. She turned and glared at me, in a low serious tone she muttered clearly, "I'm so not putting up with you this weekend." and abrubtly turned away giving me her back as she looked out the window. If I had wolf ears, they'd be on the floor. I felt bad, I hated pissing her off.. And I hated when she was so snippy and doesn't even try to be nice. I stared at her for a moment, then slouched against the window frowning. Mrs. Chell started to ask Rinca about her sleep over, and Rinca would mutter back so apathetically her responses, and then, Mrs. Chell asked if we needed to pick up some food for the picinic. Rinca moodily explained we'd be too late anyways, and how we were late as of now. I watched Mrs. Chells face, her eyes were sad and she frowned, I felt as bad as she did. So she tried explaining, "I was told to be there at twelve Rinca, if I knew to be sooner-" when Rinca cut off, obviously wanting to not put up with anyone. "I know! It's fine! We're gonna be late so we'll be late, what fucking ever it doesn't matter now!" and growled again before slumping against the window. "Rinca.." I tried, she completely ignored me. And Mrs. Chell looked hurt and sad. I sighed and slid down in the seat some, when my knee touched Rincas, she jerked it away. I looked at her, in her black shirt with the ghost ship, and her black baggy shorts, her palm pressed to her chin as she propped her elbow on the arm rest. Sighing again silently, I looked out the window, cursing myself out for starting such a bad mood. I didn't mean to piss her off.. Maybe had I been silent, she would be in a better mood. I hated myself the whole way till we got to her house, trailer sorta. Rinca slowly got out, leaving her bag in the car and going inside to retrieve her things. I followed, taking her bag in for her and ghosted her around the house keeping a distance though. When in her room, she started looking for things, and found a grey shirt, which she half heartedly threw towards me, I caught it, and slipped it on. She then vanished to the bathroom to slip into gear, when she came back to gather a few other things, she saw I had her back. She pinched her eyebrows and asked annoyed, "Why'd you bring it in?" I shrugged. "Well.. you left it in the car, and I didn't know if you wanted it in.." I said, pushing my things off her bed. "I need to take it with me anyways." she said. Well damn, I just can't win here. I hated it, HATED it, when I couldn't make her smile, I hated it even more when I was the cause of her annoyance, her anger, her stress. And quite frankly, I usually am if I'm around. "Sorry." I said, not wanting to hurt her feelings, but wanting her to know I didn't like the way she said things. The rest was a blur, we got in the car, and she was in a slighty better mood. But, that's when I'm happiest, when she is. Everytime she does her backwards smile and laugh, I can't help but get all bubbly, like, when a little kid gets a puppy. I don't rememeber what we talked about, because it wasn't much. When we got to the school, Mrs. Chell told us both, that she'd pick us up from competition and wished us best of luck. Rinca by now was in a fair mood, but still a little lethargic. We were at the back of the school. Crunchy white gravel beneath our feet, greenish brown grass clinging to the ground and sides of the side walk, a brick building that dove in on itself slightly. Rinca and I passed by pizza boxes and punch bowls on our way into the bandroom on the right, were we sat down for a little while. I must have mentally blacked out then, because the only thing I remember, was helping her with make-up, Innjeh showing up, and then onto the busses.

Of course, I do actually remember a few other things, meeting the band-aids, Veron (the butch lesbian) Icky (ew) and a bunch of to-goods who had tons of inside jokes, including "I hate fractions!" which was said about everytime i asked a question or said something.

i like the last compition the best^^

Though it was supposed to be only an hour or so long, it felt even shorter than that. I sat with Rinca, Innjeh infront of us. We rode the bus all the way across town, and eventually came to a school called White Oak (do not go searching for it >.>) It was organized chaos getting off the busses at first, everyone yelling, but tolerated and looking all in synch. Rinca and Innjeh both got off and lined up with the rest, while I stood beside Mr. Shrek and he directed me to go with the rest of the band-aids, which i did. After marching over to a feild where are trailer was loaded, we began to unpack. (memory sucks right now. Dont wanna write about it all.)

(It's okay we all do that but just don't admit itXD)

Anyways, things happened, Icky bitched at me like i was five, and the rest of the band-aids made jokes of me often as if i wasnt even there, especially this very preppy girl Cali, who wasnt even a band-aid herself, and had been there as much as i had. The truck pulled our trailer out onto the track, where Icky and I got off with the stand. I waited as Icky set it up for Mr. Shrek and she spit on the ground next to me, rolled her eyes and snapped at me for having a water bottle. "You better roll that up dumb bitch, or else we'll look like morons." She snapped. I sighed and twisted the bottle pretending it was her flat-chested, pencilled necked, freckled faced, red matted haired, body. Which meant the cap popped off and flew somewhere onto the field, which she snipped at me for. We waited till Mr. Shrek gave the A-okay, and we both took off, running around the track to the people on the other side who were already setting up props, but I had to run slow so Icky wouldn't look bad when I left her in the dust, however when we got there, she didnt even realise i was trying to keep a low appearance a and retorted, "You really need to lose some weight you fat-cow, look how slow you were, God." She stood hip cocked out and sucked in her stomach to look thin, but ended up looking uglier and more like a skeleton witch. I only smiled and giggled, "Yeah I know, I'm a heifer," and took my place right next to her against the opposite bleachers. "I hate fractions" Verona said, the butch lesbian of the group, A.K.A. Arleems new target. I only giggled and pretended to be stupid. "Yeah me too, I especailly hate fractions in square root manners," Then Ikki kicked me. "Shuddup, they're beggining." And I looked out onto the field. The band and corpse (Sounds like core) were standing in pose. Our theme was... Spartains or Titans i beleive.